Going round and round with the Flat Earthers

Want to do something that will leave you dumfounded, horrified, a little sad but also make burst out laughing whilst simultaneously worried for the future of humanity?

Friday, 21st December 2018, 1:18 pm
Updated Friday, 21st December 2018, 2:21 pm
Earth. Not flat.

Type the words ‘Flat Earth’ into Twitter. Sit back, take a deep breath and let the crazy commence.

I can happily spend an hour or so reading tweets from people who believe, really, truly, genuinely believe that the earth is flat, surrounded by an insurmountable wall of ice and is encased in a protective transparent dome.

You will discover a quite mind-bending amount of infuriating Trump-like ignorance and refusal to consider anything as trivial as hard facts.

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I’ve noticed that the Flat Earth arguments roughly follow the same pattern – a tweet will appear “proving” that the earth is flat.

Someone will respond with a scientifically sound fact, debunking the previous hogwash.

The Flat Earther will post a meme in response, proving absolutely nothing.

Science person will politely once more explain why they are mistaken.

Flat Earth wacko will now call them a “sheep” or “globe head”, saying if they’re not willing to have a conversation then they are going to ignore them and flounce off in huff. Sometimes though, if you really get them riled, eventually God will make an appearance in their paper-thin argument, rendering it null and void for good.

But if the Earth is flat why are we told it’s round? The government, innit. Why? Money. And all the governments of the world are in collusion over this? Yeah.

Interestingly, some celebs are giving their backing to the Flat Earth debate. That renowned intellectual and deep thinker Andrew ‘Freddie’ Flintoff believes it, as do an increasing amount of American sports stars for some reason.

Well, that’s won me over...

Have your fun with those who are merely Flat Earthers, but to go that extra mile into full-on straitjacket-worthy bedlam, have the occasional click on those who leave comments.

Then you’re entering a world of chemtrails, New World Orders, those who say there is no outer space (no, really) and Project Blue Beam which has people believing that NASA is preparing a religion which will take over the entire world with the Antichrist at its head.

Quite how NASA are going to conquer and rule over seven and half billion people when there’s only 17,000 of them, like pretty much everything else they put on Twitter, isn’t properly explained.

Just as an example, meet Flearther @FaithnTruthgrl who says “These are the last days!”, warns of an imminent fake alien invasion (as opposed to a genuine one) and believes either Pope Francis or Obama is the anti Christ mentioned in Revelation.

She had a nice wee conversation with a perfectly normal looking, middle-aged woman called @Flufferstuff, who agrees with @FaithnTruthgrl that actual demons, called ‘SerpentSeed’, roam among us, are “made from sin” and “their chins are long and their noses pointy”.