How to get rid of nuisance calls

Scam callers are a pain for all of us.
Scam callers are a pain for all of us.

We’re all sick to death of these parasites who ring up and start asking questions about your finances, or offer to get you compensation for that accident you weren’t in.

So it was a great pleasure recently when visiting a friend that I got to hear how he deals with these pests.

To see my friend try and stifle fits of laughter as he fed these crooks a pack of lies just made my day.

As he, let’s call him Tom, answered his phone and realised it was a scam call about a fake traffic accident (Tom doesn’t even drive), he put it on speakerphone so we could all enjoy the gag.

Caller: “So, did you know that you can claim compensation for that accident you had?”

Tom: “No. Do you mean I can get cash for this?”

Caller: “Definitely, we know this wasn’t your fault. When did the accident happen?”

Tom: “Dunno, I was pretty drunk.”

Caller: “Um, ok, but it wasn’t your fault, right?”

Tom: “No, they had no excuse for not seeing me coming, as I was swerving all over the road.”

Caller: “Right ... So do you remember the type of car the other party was driving?”

Tom: “Yes, it began with a ‘P’ I think.”

Caller: “um ... Peugeot?”

Tom: “No, police car.”

Caller: “You hit a police car?!? So you were arrested?”

Tom: “Nah, I managed to drive off before they knew what was happening. So I can get compensation for this?”

Caller: “You haven’t really had an accident, have you?”

Tom: “Of course I haven’t, but everytime I tell you that you keep calling me back anyway. Maybe now you’ll leave me alone.”

Apparently Tom hasn’t had a cold call since.